Learn from your past mistakes and acknowledge them but dont live in the past . Remember past mistakes to not define you. They are a small chapter in a lifelong story and the good news is YOU are the author.
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Recovering From Addiction
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Rob says
Excellent advice again, Marc. I’ve been in recovery from alcoholism for nearly twenty-three years. Your advice is exactly right. I happen to be an extrovert, so I enjoyed going to AA meetings in my early years. There is a place for AA, but it is not the answer for everyone. There is as many relapses in AA as there are in other therapies, so it is not magic. The important act, in my opinion, is to be open and honest about who you are, and to concern yourself with others and stop focusing so much upon yourself. That has worked for me, anyway. We alcoholics tend to be self-absorbed and secretive. I’m very grateful that I got sober before I did too much damage to my family or anyone else, and I’m grateful that I had a support network when I was trying to figure out “what’s wrong with me”. Thank you, Marc, for taking the time to impart your wisdom to your growing audience.
Tony says
Hello Marc, and readers:
Thank you for your insight, and astute observations on addiction. Firstly, I am an alcoholic and have been sober for 26 years. With any addiction, admitting you have a problem is your first step,and acknowledging you need help and getting it is your second step, joining A.A. will help you getting started on the road to recovery. You need to get a good sponsor, someone with the knowledge to help you through your difficult moments, but you must learn to persevere and focus on your recovery, not to take on more than you can handle. By helping others you are helping yourself. My first month was “hell” my worst hangover was when I sobered up, I was very sick, but I came through it weak but open for the help i needed. I have adopted the phrase”One Day At A Time” because that is all we have to deal with, remember ” Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, but today is a gift, that is why it is called The Present.” Your sobriety should be regarded as a milestone in your life, you will learn to think clearer, and make better choices with out feeling and guilt or shame. You past mistakes do not define who you are, but you must also remember them and make any kind of restitution for them. I myself have done things in my past that I am not very proud of, and I am trying to live One Day at a time and when the opportunity comes up I then work my program to help fix what has been done. Sometimes the results may not be what you hoped. Not every ending is a “Hollywood” ending, sometimes the persons don’t respond well, but you persevere and continue on, my advice is to stay focused and attend meetings, talk with your sponsor, and live “One Day at a Time”. Oh my mistake in my life was that I came out late. I was in my 30″s when I finally admitted that I was gay but to my surprise, everybody already knew so there was no trauma or dramatic episodes. You could say that I was “disappointed” but very relieved this was not an issue, I did not have the experience in the community as others have but during the 80’s with the AIDS crisis there was fear and uncertainty. A lot of lives were lost during this sad time in our history. I hope this has given you an overview of my experience, to you Rob, congratulation on your sobriety, and to Steven your original letter, keep up with your program, you both are special guys. I wish for you both long life and wellness good luck with your sobriety, One more thing, “We shall not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door upon it”. (AA 12 and 12 book) just stick with the program and you will get better, remember One Day At a Time.
Sorry, about the long comment, more like a dissertation, and Thank you Marc for your web blog. I will keep watching and know that your advice will be shared.
Again thank you Marc, sincerely and respectfully yours,
Tony (from Canada) XXOO
Tony (from Canada)